Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Worldly Thinking

For the past month, I've been committed to living my life in light of the Scriptures, instead of how I feel - at least, for the most part. Of course, I'm human, and I fall down a lot - but the primary directive to continue on the path is there. During this time, I've learned that the thinking that has put me out of fellowship with God in the past has been, of course, brought on by my immersion in the world and being swayed by it's thinking.

For instance, I love nature and I absolutely abhor policies that destroy or neglect the environment. I have hated developers and those who don't respect wildlife. In the past, just seeing a newly cleared area waiting for the building of yet another strip mall, or more overpriced, cookie cutter houses on top of each other, would put me in a tailspin. I'd feel the bottom drop out of my soul and despair and anger would take over my thinking. Where could God be in this? Why does the world have to be so awful sometimes? When I see animals hit by cars, I see them in my mind's eye trying desperately to survive as more and more incursions into their habitat occur - until one day, one tries to cross the road - and dies, perhaps leaving babies to starve.

In any case, the purpose of this post is to show that - if I let these things take over my thinking - and don't keep my eyes on Christ - I will fall away.

Likewise, the influence of the human viewpoint thinking of those people around me. I have to keep a barrier up against that thinking, and not let it get so far as to enter my soul.

These weaknesses in me caused by the bleakness of the world and unbelievers, at times, have bothered me for many years - until now.

I have found that keeping my eyes on the Lord, refreshing myself with His word everyday, and prayer - can keep my thinking from falling into despair and anger.

I know this is a "no duh" kind of thing - this is a basic fact Christians know - but it has become real to me in a way it was not before - so as basic as it is, I'm finding it a new truth.

One more thing I want to record here. I also used to be wrongly influenced by good things. By this, I mean that I'd read a Christian blog where the woman is a great housekeeper and cook, doesn't have to work perhaps, does crafts, etc. etc. Instead of being inspired by this to apply WHAT I CAN in MY OWN LIFE, I'd feel since I couldn't replicate the whole package, why bother with any of it - and I would feel jealous of the other person's circumstances and resentful of my own.

Finally, I'm able to appreciate what I have, and where I can make what I have better by learning from others, I'm satisfied. When I read something and feel that old feeling begin - that I should be like this person and that what I have to work with won't cut it - I push that away immediately. I remember that God has a plan for me, and it includes MY circumstances, not someone else's. I can keep it all in a positive light and learn from others, rather than be overwhelmed by the talent and ability of others - and apply my new knowledge to the life God has given me, and be thankful. It is so freeing not to be swayed by others. Is so-and-so going on a diet? I should do that, and used to feel guilty when I didn't. Is so-and-so starting exercise? I should do that, and used to feel guilty, etc. etc. Now, I listen to other's plans, but I stick to my own path. My own path is guided by the Lord. He is molding me and shaping me daily, as I allow Him - and those things I should do will come to me, without the frantic effort that those in the world employ.

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